Student Life

STUDENT LIVING: Celebrity chatterbox-Russel Peters is “all for cheating”

Canadian comedian Russell Peters performed last week at Place des Arts and caught up with the Tribune to discuss college, cheating, and being Canadian.

You’re very popular with college students. What’s your favourite college experience? I never went to college.

How do you feel about Montreal? I love it here. It’s a great city.

If you could name three of your favourite things about Montreal, what would they be? Strip clubs, massage parlours and friteries.

Have you heard of McGill? Yes, I’ve heard of McGill. What was your impression of it? It’s hard for me to answer a question like that because I never went to university. McGill is a university. I don’t have impressions of any universities. I performed there once. The thing is, if they had me [perform there], it’s probably not a very good university, (laughs).

Do you think it’s right for college students to cheat on exams? Yes! Absolutely. I’m all for cheating. If you can get ahead that way, then go for it. As long as you feel that it wouldn’t affect your conscience.

How would you feel if you had a doctor, and he was about to cut you open, and he happened to cheat his way through school, and then you died? Well, I think that if he was such a talented cheater that he managed to get to the point where he was about to cut me open, then I think that, as a doctor, he’s gotta be pretty damn good.

Did you cheat in high school? I didn’t have to. I went to retard high school.

Favourite food? Chocolate.

What’s the stupidest thing that you’ve heard Americans say about Canada, living in LA? It was July, and somebody said ‘I heard it was freezing up there.’ And I looked, and the temperature was actually hotter in Toronto than in LA.

There’s the common metaphor that the US is a melting pot and that Canada is a mosaic. Today, I read a quotation that says Canada is more like a tossed salad than a mosaic. What is Canada like to you? Canada, to me, is a country that never addresses how racist it really is. I’m not afraid to say it.

What do you think of the CBC? I think the CBC stands for “Canadians Buying Content.”

Weirdest thing a journalist has asked you: Journalists always ask me the same kinds of questions. I don’t get weird ones very often. But the most annoying question I get asked is ‘What did your parents think when you told them you were gonna be a comedian?’ because it’s not like I told them I was going to molest children for a living, or something. It’s not like they didn’t get it [my decision to become a comedian]. They were like ‘alright, whatever.’

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