Student of the Week: Cosmo Kramer

a/Student Living by

This week’s Student of the Week is Cosmo Kramer, a U1 anthropology student . He was nominated for his entrepreneurial spirit, athletic prowess, and for being an active presence around campus.

MT: You’ve started all sorts of initiatives around campus. Which has been the most successful?

CK: Well, last year in residence, I got funding to start the Douglas Hall beekeeping society. We had some good times in that club—lots of really nice characters, when they weren’t trying to sting you—and we sold some honey for profit on the side. It got a little out of hand though, and ended up starting the infamous Douglas Hall bee infestation. That’s why they’ve got students over in Varcity515 this year, you know.

MT: Have any of your other ventures gone differently than expected?

CK: Well, I’ve noticed that students around campus are always dehydrated, especially after a night out, so last January I decided to start a business selling students water. This was going to be a big operation, mind you, so I had to go straight to the source. I went up to the reservoir and tapped into a water main—one of the big ones. I’m not really sure what happened, but next thing I knew, I woke up soaking wet way down in Old Port.

MT: At this point, have people been approaching your new ideas with any amount of skepticism?

CK: Absolutely. I don’t understand it! For example, at the beginning of this term, I wanted to have a welcome party for [incoming Deputy Provost (Student Life and Learning)] Ollivier Dyens up on the sixth floor of the James Administration building. There’s lots of room up there, and I thought putting it close to his office would minimize the inconvenience for him. I brought balloons and cake, but they wouldn’t even let me inside.

MT: You were briefly on the Redmen cross-country team. Why did you quit?

CK: Well, the team’s first meet of the year was up on Mount Royal. I was doing well, feeling good—real limber, you know—when I saw a berry bush. Now on long runs, you never know when you’ll need emergency sustenance, so I decided to stock up before

somebody else got to them. When I got back on the path, I must have taken a wrong turn, and ended up spending two weeks lost on the mountain, just wandering. On the plus side, when I finally found my way back down, it was the only time I’ve ever been early to a class at the McIntyre medical building.

MT: What was your ‘welcome to McGill’ moment?

CK: Probably the time I showed up at 11:30 p.m. to line up for the Midnight Kitchen. They should really give it a new name.

  • Alex Simakov

    I don’t get i

  • theDude

    not sure if fake, or the guy is just plain stupid.