(mcgillathletics.ca)

First-year intramural team, Threezus, falls to 0-6 in gritty affair

Joke by

In another riveting Open B intramural game, Threezus (0-6) fell to Love Competition Ball (6-0) 86-35.

When Threezus forward Jeffrey Smith, U0 Arts, joined his intramural basketball team for the winter season, it’s safe to say he didn’t know what he was getting into. The McGill Tribune was unable to attend any of the team’s practices, as it has opted to keep their training sessions closed to media.

Like many intramural teams, the 10 first-year students on the roster seem to believe they’re better than they are. Threezus team captain Leo DiNardo put together his roster of friends and residence-mates on a whim, picking short guards and surprisingly not-much-taller forwards and centres. In their matchup with last year’s Open B champions, Love Competition Ball, Threezus was simply overwhelmed by the height, speed, and skill of their opponents, losing by a 51-point margin in the final game of the regular season.

When they briefly took a 3-0 lead, hooting and hollering could be heard on the Threezus bench. A quick 19-0 run by Love Competition Ball, however, took the bounce out of the game. DiNardo called a timeout in an attempt to regain momentum, then subbed all five bench players into the game—himself included

“It wouldn’t be fair to start myself,” DiNardo later explained.

Slapping his hands on the floor, DiNardo verbally expressed his readiness to play defence. By the time he’d finished slapping the floor, his man had already blown by, scoring an easy lay-up.

Threezus forward Ronald Scott, his high school basketball team’s statistics manager, was very clear that, while the team lacks any applicable skill, they’re certainly louder, more passionate, and definitely more positive than any of their competition.

“Last semester, a guy crossed me over so hard that I literally broke my ankles,” Scott said. “But that didn’t happen this semester, so who’s the real winner here?”

After putting up a combined eight points in the first half, Threezus turned their attention to their most pressing issue: Defence. During the two-minute halftime break, the team discussed maybe switching to zone defence at some point because what they’re doing now certainly isn’t working.

“We just have to communicate better in the future,” DiNardo said. “They got out and ran and we have to stop those transition buckets.”

Threezus is a team that can be prescribed with the classic case of overconfidence. In their attempts to prescribe their defensive deficiencies, they neglected the offensive end where they’ve gone as cold as the Montreal January. The high-school to university intramural jump wasn’t as kind as they hoped.

Next up for Threezus is midterm season, while Love Competition Ball will move onto the Open Intermediate B quarterfinals next weekend. That should be more fun to watch.

 

Notable

Threezus forward Jeffrey Smith debuted a fresh pair of Velcro kicks that you just have to see to believe.

Quotable

“I read this thing somewhere, it went like this. ‘Finish last in your league and they call you an idiot. Finish last in medical school and they call you a doctor.’ I think that might be relevant here, somehow.” – Threezus team captain Leo DiNardo

Stat Corner

Love Competition Ball scored an Open Intermediate B record 79 fast break points.