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Joke - page 7

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JOKE ISSUE: Less than mediocrity

After a year that included a few wins, the McGill football team is confident that it won't disappoint fans next year by being mediocre. The team plans to continue their losing streak, extending it to as many as three years. Star running back Alexander Hamilton will not be returning, which will help the Redmen get a fresh start on losing.
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JOKE ISSUE: Grillz come to McGill

The McGill administration has announced that McGrills - grills shaped like the word McGill - will be available at the McGill Bookstore, effective immediately. In an interview with the Tribune, Vice-Principle (University Services) Jim Nicell was excited by the grills, which he hopes will boost student pride.
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JOKE ISSUE: Adventures in abstinence

Let me make things perfectly clear: I am a virgin. Never been kissed, disrobed, or had my hand held. Now let me make something even clearer: I'm not a virgin because no one wants to have sex with me, but because I'm incredibly good-looking - think an 11 on a scale of 10 - and I can get anyone I want.
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JOKE ISSUE: Snoop D-O-double-G-P-S

Owners of the TomTom GPS navigation system can now choose to "roll down the street, sippin' on gin and juice" with rap superstar Snoop Dogg (who does not, in any way, advocate drinking and driving) as their guide. The voiceskin is available for purchase from TomTom for $12.
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JOKE ISSUE: The Francophone Conspiracy: confuse Anglophones

When I moved to Quebec to attend McGill, I knew I would have to learn a little bit of French. I saw this challenge as an exciting opportunity to learn something new - but I never imagined it would be so phenomenally difficult. French is riddled with words that sound exactly alike, yet have completely different meanings.
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